after several talks with him, i realised how badly i have treated him. i realised i was the one who is being unreasonable, immature. he was nice enough to tolerate my attitude. i need to change before it is too late. now that, i am going to be 20 in one week, i have to be more matured. stereotyping is bad. showing unnecessary attitude at the wrong time is bad. maybe i got too pampered by him and i am taking him for granted.. that is bad! so.. it is time for me to change.. for the better! :)
i just dont want to lose him. he is someone special in my life now.. so i got to change myself.
2. save money
i need to save more money.. have to think for the future.
to me, saving money is the hardest. but i will try. 3. work hard
the days ahead are getting harder.. cos there is more work to do. i have to work hard cos i am still on probation till oct 23rd. there are really alot of things to learn in the department.. xueli, jiayou ba! :))
sidetrack from my birthday resolution. i really feel that i am not worthy for him at times, seriously. it is like... from our talks, he made me realised how farked up i am. maybe i was the one who is at fault to cause my previous relationship to be a failure. failed to be in my loved one's shoes to see his point of view. i was told that i am unreasonable and ridiculous in my previous relationship. havent i learnt from that? why am i still behaving in this way? why at times i still do things that i know i shouldnt be doing? it is because i am so farked up in my attitude, thats why he is fed up. though both of us have flaws, he is much more matured, thoughtful, caring... if he can be so tolerant towards me, why cant i do the same? if i continue to behave this way... it will be harmful to both of us.
though my birthday is coming, at first i am not really looking forward. dont know why. well, sugarcane is planning! whee~ so i am looking forward to this coming friday! :D
